Live In The Moment …
One year ago … one year ago yesterday to be exact, my life took a turn I never saw coming.
It was October 10, 2023…. I already felt like my life had been turned upside down from the publication of my book The Gathering Room - A Tale of Nelly Butler. The experiences I had, the people I had met, the places I had been to, my goodness I never thought any of that would happen to me in my life! I often said I couldn’t believe any of this was real because I was just somebody’s mom! Hahahaha. I still feel like I’m just the mom.
But on that day one year ago everything changed. I had been contacted by WABI TV, the local TV station, to do an interview. Halloween was approaching, my book is always popular around Halloween because at it’s core it’s a ghost story. So I wasn’t surprised when they reached out to me. I agreed to do the interview but I wanted someone from the town of Sullivan to be included. Specifically I wanted someone from the Sullivan Historical Society involved to speak to the actual history behind my story. I did not want this interview to be a book promo. My book sells just fine by itself. What I wanted from this interview was what I had wanted from the beginning. Using the vehicle of fiction to shine the light and attention on the actual history.
So I reached out to Tobey Crawford at the historical society and asked if she would do the interview with me. She eagerly agreed, as I knew she would. Tobey had been an early supporter of my book. She had invited me down to Sullivan to speak at the historical society’s meeting in December 2022, only three months after the book had been published. I had such a great time and was so impressed with the organization that I wrote out a check right there and became a lifetime member of the Sullivan-Sorrento Historical Society! And when I got my first social media “hater” Tobey worked tirelessly online trying to clear up historical inaccuracies in that person’s perception. This person felt the Blaisdells were not being portrayed accurately. My strategy in dealing with this person was to just let it be. I don’t do drama. But Tobey felt strongly that this person needed to be reminded that history belongs to everyone and no one person could claim a history as their own. I finally relented and told Tobey if she wanted to respond to go ahead. I remember Tobey’s comments and how eloquently she stated the facts that this person was misconstruing. I knew she had my back on this one. I trusted Tobey. I was glad she was my friend.
It was Tobey who also worked with Acadia Seashores Campground and Flanders Bay BBQ to put together an event in July of 2023 that brought me back to Sullivan to speak to a barn packed with people. It was the largest event I had ever done. And it was Tobey who messaged me just before that event to let me know that there would be Butler and Blaisdell descendants in attendance when I got there. I was so excited! That night Tobey brought a wonderful display of historical items that we set up near where I was speaking. Again I was thankful for Tobey and her support of me and the book. So naturally she was the person I wanted with me when I did an interview on location in Sullivan.
In the days leading up to the scheduled interview with WABI, Tobey and I spoke many times about locations she wanted to take the TV crew to. The Blaisdell Cemetery, the Blaisdell’s basement where Nelly’s ghost had actually appeared, things like that. We also talked about the actual Butler and Blaisdell descendants who had been at the Flanders BBQ event back in July. It was Tobey who gave me the phone number of Bud Means, the man who is George Butler’s 4th great grandson. Turns out Bud was also the Chief Selectman for the Town of Sullivan. It would be great if he did the interview with us too! Well this was just getting better and better! Not only would the historical society be represented but now the Town itself would have a spokesperson. I remember my first text message to Bud. “Tobey Crawford gave me your phone number. I’m the author that wrote the book The Gathering Room. WABI wants to do an interview on the 10th there in Sullivan. Would you be available to do it with Tobey and I? Do you even want to?” Thankfully he said yes!
So on the morning of October 10th I found myself standing in the parking lot of the Sullivan Rec Center with Tobey and Bud waiting for WABI to arrive. It was a weird experience for me. Not going to lie, I was kind of starstruck. Imagine spending six years of your life imagining what George Butler was like and now here you are looking at his great, great, great, great grandson. Absolutely freaky!!
When WABI finally arrived we started filming Tobey first. I wanted this interview to be all about the history and the best place to do that was in the room that held all of the records. It was my first real shock of the day. That moment when Tobey turned to me and let me hold the actual records bearing George Butler and Abner Blaisdell’s names. I don’t think I have ever smiled so much in my life. Again, six years of my life had been obsessed with this history and now I was holding the real documents in my hands!
From there we went to the Blaisdell cemetery and Tobey pointed out where she thought Lydia’s parents were more then likely buried in unmarked graves. I was so thankful she was with us so she could point this out. Obviously I would have never known this for myself. She was invaluable that day. The camera was set up and it was my turn to be interviewed. I remember even saying on camera that this was all so amazing. The shock of where I was, who I was with and how my life had gotten too that point was a lot. All of a sudden the reality of the situation hit me. I was standing on Blaisdell burial grounds with a Butler descendant.
I remember the way the sunlight shone through the trees. The way the wind was blowing. The way everything in my life, at that moment, felt like it had come full circle. What had started out as just me reading a bit of history and wanting to let my imagination run with it for my own entertainment. To it becoming a six year obsession where I felt like I lived with George, Nelly, Lydia, and the rest, as real people. To the book becoming a real thing that snowballed into something bigger than I could have ever dreamed of. To this moment in time where I was standing there, in Sullivan, in a cemetery watching a TV crew talk to a direct descendant of my main character. My eyes filled with tears, I was so grateful to whatever force had moved in my life to let me experience all of this. What a magical life!!
It was in that moment that I walked over to Bud and asked him if he would do a selfie with me. I was certain he thought I was crazy, but I didn’t care. He was literally a total stranger to me. We had been together for all of a couple of hours at this point but hadn’t said more than a few words to each other. I had spent the two hours staring at him if you want to know the truth! To me he held rockstar status, and honestly I never thought I would see him again. So I wasn’t going to pass up an opportunity to get a selfie with him.
As we stepped toward each other and I raised my camera up high (I always take selfies with the camera higher then my chin!) I smiled, he leaned in and something changed. I snapped the photo, he stepped away, he looked at me and I looked at him. Something had just happened in that moment. We both felt it. It was a moment that I have never forgotten. A moment that I caught on camera. Just like you can’t explain what faith is or why you believe in something so strongly. It was one of those moments in life where it’s obvious that words have limitations. But in that moment something changed. The only English word that comes close to describing what happened to us in that moment is “knowing”. That moment meant something. We didn’t realize at the time what it meant, I only felt strongly that it wasn’t just an ordinary moment. Because we were strangers I didn’t say anything and neither did he. It would be months, and many other mysterious happenings before we found ourselves in a place where we could talk about the cemetery selfie and what it had felt like to each of us. In that moment we both “knew”.
From the cemetery Tobey led us, Bud on his motorcycle, the WABI crew in their van and myself in my car, to the site of the Blaisdell’s home where Nelly’s ghost had appeared. It is private property so we couldn’t go walking around, but Tobey assured us the cellar hole of the house was just off the road there in the woods. I remember snapping several photos of trees and being thrilled with that! Pictures of trees! But it was what Tobey told me laid beyond in those trees that held my fascination. Again my mind turned back to the six years I had spent imagining all of this and here I was standing on the same land that all of them, George, Lydia, Abner and Nelly’s ghost had traversed all those years ago. My whole body shook from the excitement of what was happening to me that day.
WABI had interviewed Tobey with the historical records, me in the cemetery and now it was Bud’s turn at the location where Nelly’s ghost had actually appeared. I stood back and watched as they got just the right lighting, waited for the wind to stop blowing, talked to him about the questions they would ask, and all the while I just kept staring at him. How could any of this be real? This man’s ancestor had been a pivotal figure in a ghost story that some say is the first documented ghost sighting in America. We were standing near the location of the sighting of that ghost. Standing on land that Lydia Blaisdell herself had walked across. Maybe it’s because I’m a history nerd, but I was having the best day of my life! I was living in this moment and absorbing all that I could!
After Bud’s interview we all headed back to our cars, that was it my “one moment” was over. I remember shaking Bud’s hand and thanking him for coming. It was really an awesome treat for me to meet a direct descendant of George Butler’s! I remember hugging Tobey and thanking her for helping with this. It had turned out exactly as I had wanted it to be. A spotlight on the Town of Sullivan, its history and the unique ghost that has forever haunted that area.
Little did I realize it was just the beginning of the most magical part of my journey yet! One moment that changed the course of my life. A life that had already swung in a direction I never imagined, now just took a sharp turn in a moment. A moment that I will forever be grateful that I lived in! I was focused on that moment. Not worrying about yesterday or fussing over tomorrow, but fully present in that moment. I could have missed a very important message that came in that moment if I hard been focusing on what I had to do next. Thinking about my grocery list, or did I need to do laundry? All of the mundane things that rush through our minds every day. If my mind had been anywhere else that day I would have missed it.
There is so much out there for us …. slow down, focus on the moment you are in. It could change your life.
You can watch the interview Bud and I did last year for yourself at the link below.
https://www.wabi.tv/video/2023/10/13/tale-nelly-butler-comes-full-circle/